You have a low libido, and you want to find your desire back.

You can't remember the last time you actually felt like having sex. At the start of every new relationship there was arousal and desire but after a few months this vanished. Your busy job, the arrival of kids, having a busy life are not helping. Now, you avoid any kind of intimacy; you make sure you don't go to bed at the same time, you no longer want to kiss or hug for fear that your partner will get aroused and that you have to say 'no' again. It's been that way for a long time. You feel guilty and are afraid that your partner will stray if things don't change. You wonder what is wrong with you and you feel broken. It is not normal to have no libido, right? Sometimes you think back to those early days of the relationship, when lovemaking was great, and you were a woman that had ''sexy''. How you long to be that woman again.  

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You long for sexual freedom.

When you make love, you're mainly in your head. You are simply not able to focus on your body and pleasure. This has sex often feel like a chores. You know that the sex could be better but have no idea how. Sex was not something that was discussed when you grew up. Therefore, you never learned to shamelessly experience pleasure. Yet you notice more and more often that there is a part in you that longs to feel uninhibited. That longs for sexual freedom. There is a desire to have sex and to talk about sex without guilt and shame. A desire to fully enjoy sex and perhaps a desire to try new things. 

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​You want to learn to have an orgasm.

Are you one of the 25% of women who rarely or never has an orgasm? Or one of the approximately 70% of women who doesn't orgasm from penetration alone? Then you might recognise the feeling of frustration and feeling unsatisfied after sex. Although you often enjoy the sex and it gives you lots of pleasure, it mostly goes way too fast for you. By the time you are just getting started, your partner is done and that is the end of the sex. No orgasm for you again! You see your partner lying in bed, satisfied and exhausted, and you feel disappointment. Is there something wrong we me that I can't orgasm, you wonder? How wonderful it would be to be able to fully surrender in sex and to have an orgasm (or a few...). 

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​You want to learn more about ''sacred sexuality'' from a Daoist or Tantric perspective.

In Daoist and Tantra-based sexuality, sexual arousal is mainly seen as sexual energy. As a sexual flow that you can feel throughout your entire body, not just in your genitals. Moreover, sexual energy is considered an important source of life force energy. So by cultivating sexual energy, you enrich your whole life with more life force energy. Sexuality based on practices form Daoist and Tantric traditions are focussed on connection. Connection to all that is alive inside you and allowing this to be there. This includes all thoughts, emotions but also your (sexual) desires and arousal. By doing these practices, you will deepen the intimacy with yourself and, if you have a partner, with each other. 

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You experience painful penetration.

There can be many reasons why lovemaking, especially penetration, is painful. For example, after childbirth, due to aging or during menopause. As soon as he enters you, it hurts. Sometimes it starts ok but after a few minutes you notice the pain. Instead of expressing this, you often hope that he will orgasm as quickly as possible so that it is over, and the pain stops. Sometimes you even fake an orgasm because you know it will make him come faster. You feel broken and alone. You don't want to tell him it hurts for fear of hurting his feelings. You tell yourself that it's not so bad. After all, it's only once a week (or less, if you manage to avoid it for longer). Besides, sex (and especially penetration) is part of a good relationship, right?  Yet, you notice that you are getting less and less in the mood for sex and that you are increasingly avoiding it. Is there a way to find pleasure in sex again? It feels very far away. 

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You desire to overcome (sexual) trauma. 

(sexual) assault, a traumatic childbirth or more ''everyday'' events such as severe stress, an illness or any other impactful event that felt too much, too soon or too quick can greatly impact the relationship with your body and your intimate life. Often times you feel very disconnected from your body and your pleasure. In that case we sometimes do a few sessions where we incorporate Somatic Experiencing. This is a world-renowned body - based trauma resolution modality that will make you feel more resilient, and alive and will enable you to experience pleasure again.  

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There are other (sexual) problems.

You are also welcome to have a free exploration call if there are other (sexual) problems then the once mentioned here.

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I can help you to experience more freedom; in your body, your sexuality and sensuality. Let's discuss how!​​​​